he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize