Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
