You just made me feel so damn special
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize