MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
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