Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
It's never too late to be topless.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Randomize
