Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
