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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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