Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
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