i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
I am mentally ready for anal.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Randomize
