He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
