she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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