super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
