Sry I called you an 8
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Randomize
