I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
The best revenge is premature balding
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Randomize
