everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
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