i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
Randomize
