So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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