It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
