we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Randomize
