I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize