the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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