would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
