from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Randomize