They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
