Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Randomize
