bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
