Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize