so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
