just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
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