found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Randomize
