I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
