Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Randomize