Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
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