wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I showed him my bush... on skype.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
The free coupon that printed out with the purchase of my plan b emergency contraception was for allergy meds. I feel like a coupon for condoms would've been more fitting in this situation.
Oh wait. It's for wart remover. Fitting, afterall.
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