that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
