he was CRYING into my vagina
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
