I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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