Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
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