Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
it was like having sex with a tree stump
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Randomize
