How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
