you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Randomize
