Me too!
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
you mean i was at the winter classic?
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
Randomize
