i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
