Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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