i barfeds in our rink
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
This gyro tastes like lonliness
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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