Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Screwed.edu
like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
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