Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
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