Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
