it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
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