he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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